For centuries, the Gnoughty Gnome Clan has lived on Inchcolm Island in the Firth of Forth in Scotland or what is now known as Inch Gnome Island. They are an intelligent and curious bunch. They have explored every inch of the island and researched its constant changes. They live simply in their small homes with their wooden porches and welcome mats. They love to entertain and discuss scholastic readings. They have been known to be spellcasters and charmers bringing humans to the island for favors in exchange for trinkets and books. They have been known to pull a prank or two on said humans for a story to tell at dinnertime. Their interest in the unknown has led to a few dangerous experiments that resulted in the demise of a gnome or two. All in all they are a happy, easy going bunch of gnoughty gnomes.
A scandal rocked this small island some 10 years ago when a love like no other destroyed what was once a sacred place for all wood gnomes. A mistress of the island traveled to a small town in California called Castaic or also referred to as Gnome Island. This area of California is known for its garden gnomes; a much detested clan of gnomes. Her love for the youngest son of the Prime Gnome soon resulted in a pregnancy. The Prime Gnome would not hear of such treacherous acts and sent the mistress back to Inch Gnome Island. Her family was thrilled to have her home and welcomed her and her unborn bairn. However, the happiness of having her home was short lived. The bairn was born with the small noses and rounded ears of the garden gnomes. He grew quickly and soon became twice as large as the small wooden gnomes. He ate more, demanded more attention, and always had a scowl on his face. Instead of the warm Earth tones the wooden gnomes wore, he insisted on the green pants, blue shirt, and bright red hat of his garden gnome ancestors. He frightened the gnomes of Inch Gnome Island. Not but a few months after he was born, the baby gnome stood at the edge of the island and watched the tourists go by. He stood tall; he stood proud. Tourists took pictures and posted to their social media accounts. It wasn’t long after that more garden gnomes started to appear. They were a cruel lot. The once witty and jovial clan of wooden gnomes began to hide in their homes; only to leave when necessary.
Leaving Inch Gnome Island
After suffering for many years, the Gnoughty Gnome Clan wasn’t sure what they were going to do, but knew they couldn’t live like this any longer. For months they debated and one day they received a letter from Shame-ish. Shame-ish the Gnoughty Gnome is adventurous, mischievous, and a risk-taker. He hitched a ride on an airplane and parachuted into Eastern Texas some months ago. Shame-ish told about his adventures and life with his new family. Knowing the other gnomes of his clan were just as miserable as he was when living there, he invited them to join him in the United States. They decided this was the only option they had so they bought passage on a ship and left their home of many centuries to start a new life in America.
Travels to America
The Gnoughty Gnome Clan boarded the ship to America in November. They were tucked away in the storage area of the ship out of sight. Humans are not always welcoming to what they believe to be mystical creatures. The gnomes made the best of the situation and settled in for the long ride across the Atlantic. The 6 week trip turned into 8 as storms blew in from every direction. They became sea sick and couldn’t hold any food down. Their hair and beards became infested with fleas and lice which made them scratch until they bled and their hair fall out in chunks. Eventually a steward took pity on them and shaved what was left of their hair and their beards. When they finally reached land, they were malnourished, pale, and weak. However, this was the longest, hardest part of their trip which gave them hope and motivation to continue on.
Journey through Texas
For 6 long days, the gnomes walked North through Texas. They drank when water was available. They ate when they could find food. Mostly, they roasted roaches and beetles over small fires at night. They slept when they couldn’t go any further. They dreamed of the life that was waiting for them. They say those dreams are what got them to The Scottish Way. At the end of the 6th day, they reached the Chief of the Texas Gnoughty Gnome Clan. Their feet were blistered, bruised, bleeding, and raw from the grueling walk. They were exhausted, hungry, and dehydrated. They were defeated and downhearted. The Chief and his lovely wife made them a camp in their backyard with clean linens and warm blankets. They were served neeps and tatties. They were given plenty of water and shots of whiskey. Their injuries were tended to and stories of their journey were shared. When all the food and drink were consumed, the Gnoughty Gnome Clan stretched out in their soft, warm beds and slept.
Arriving at Gnome Hollow
The final day of their journey started with a bowl of porridge and warm goat milk. After their bellies were full and their energy restored, they began the last segment of their tiring journey. The key to the gnome tunnels was given to Sergeant Hecter. He was to lead the wooden gnomes to their home in Louisiana. After saying a tearful goodbye to the Chief and his wife, the gnomes entered the underground world that would lead them home. They traveled for what would seem like hours in complete darkness. The tunnels twisted and turned. They climbed and descended. They grew narrow and they expanded. There was complete silence one moment and thundering sounds from above the next. The little gnomes continued on and on. Then the tunnels began climbing and steps soon appeared before them. They climbed and climbed until their little legs began to give out. Just when they thought they couldn’t take another step, light appeared through a door. Sergeant Hecter cautiously opened the door and peeped out. To his surprise and much to his relief stood Shame-ish and a human woman who was grinning ear to ear and squealing with much excitement. After all the wooden gnomes were out of the tunnel and in proper clan formation, Sergeant Hecter and the Gnoughty Gnome Clan were introduced to Mrs. Gnome and welcomed into The Hollow.
WELCOME GNOUGHTY GNOME CLAN TO LOUISIANA
and GNOME HOLLOW!!
Watch for further adventures of The Gnoughty Gnome Clan.